Some time ago, I realized that my life was not showing up the way I desired. I wasn’t finding true joy and happiness in everyday things and I felt helpless to change it. I knew something was off, but I couldn’t detach myself from the ‘clutter’ long enough to figure out a solution.
As is the nature of the Universe, Akua Soadwa, my good friend and founder of Let’s Pursue You, a life coaching practice that empowers women to live the lives they desire, was working on expanding her practice. She was looking for someone to work with in exchange for some programmatic feedback and promotion. I was in! It was God’s way of saying ‘I got you.’
To be honest, when we started, I wasn’t sure that I would be able to let go of decades of self-image baggage. I’d taught myself to live smaller, stay in the background and sacrifice for others in lieu of doing for me. It led to me being emotionally numb, slightly ambivalent about my sense of style and self and overly focused on other people’s perceptions of who they thought I was. I had created and learned to live in my own personality prison.
The first thing we did was dismantle the stories I’d been telling myself. It was deep. Like I didn’t know those feelings were inside me deep. Issues I had with my parents – mom, father and stepfather – flooded to the surface from their nicely contained spaces. It was hard to sit with those feelings, hard deal with the ugly that I didn’t want to see or anger I didn’t want to resolve toward them. But progress meant looking and seeing. It meant going in my emotional basement and dealing with the black mold feelings. But I did the work and Akua was there to acknowledge and push me past the comfortably uncomfortable points.
A year later, I realized that as I’ve been there to rescue myself, I stripped myself of the things that made me distinctly feminine. After all the old baggage is mostly cleared out, I realized that I like glitter, nail polish, getting my hair done, perfume, cute shoes, clothes and accessories and – wait for it – makeup. The work now revolves around me rediscovering what it means to be feminine, to allow The Hero to show up and be my Prince Charming, to stand down instead of always being ready to defend my awesome womanness without losing sight of who I am at my core.
So this is going to be a series as I go through this process. You’ll get to come on my girly trips and be a fly on the proverbial wall of my sessions with Akua.
Is there an area of your life that you know needs some attention so you can become the wonderful person you want to be? I highly encourage you to contact Akua at firstname.lastname@example.org. You’ll be glad you did.
And stay tuned for the next installment: Checking My Shoe Game.
*This is not a sponsored post. I write this out of my satisfaction with Let’s Pursue You and Akua’s professionalism and dedication to helping me manifest the life I want to live.