There aren’t too many things that surprise me about my son lately. I have very few expectations from him developmentally speaking because I want him to be who he is, not who I want him to be. So I take it easy until I heard his side of a conversation:
Kid: Getting my salad tossed?
Me: The hell…? (some swerving on 71 south)
Kid: (laughing) Oh my god, you should see my mom’s face right now….
Me: Do you know what that means?
Kid: (whispering) Well *** is about to tell me, but you just spazzed a little so I got distracted.
Me: Yeah… you ask *** to tell you because I want to know how in the hell two 15-year-old teenage boys know what that means.
Kid: Did you hear that? Okay, so tell me. (silence then laughing). Ohhhh….
Me: What does it mean?
Kid: It means two men having sex. Here, let me put *** on speaker.
Me: Um… no. It means someone is licking your ***hole (sorry, people, I didn’t cut any words)
(both boys laughing)
Kid: (to ***) See? I told you my mom says anything. She’s cool.
Me: I’m about education. You will NOT be able to say ‘But, Mom, I didn’t know….’ You run the risk of me blacking out and hurting you.
He continued to talk to his friend for the remainder of our trip back to Columbus and I continued to eavesdrop on his end of the conversation. I realized that I trust the Kid. I wrote before that I’m confident about what’s inside him already. There will be times when he just HAS to touch the stove to see if it’s hot, but then I remember that I did the same thing too, so I can’t be so upset when he does. His life will be fulfilling to him if he lives it fearlessly and sometimes that means living through bad choices or big mistakes. I have three more years of high school years to experience and barring becoming a grandparent, I think I’ll handle them with class and finesse.